Little Me...
Everything in your life right now is going to seem bloody confusing, the future seems uncertain and you will be faced with problems and dramas that are going to shape you, change you into the future you. Heck, choosing a chocolate bar at the local coop is going to seem like a bitch of a task to you, but don't worry - you make the right decisions in the end... just don't pick Bounty...I don't regret anything that has brought me to where I am now, sitting here writing this, in my unicorn pyjama pants I may add (Isnt it satisfying to know you're still awesome like that?!). So don't worry about the decisions you have to make or difficult situations you have found yourself in.
However, if there is one piece of advice I will share with you, Its this.
You don't have to be so quiet, so shy and reserved. Being afraid of what people think of you is normal i know, but speaking out every once in a while isn't a bad thing. Tell that Stacey to shut up if you want to - You don't have to back down for everything. If you want something just speak out and ask, fight for it. You shouldn't have to compromise on happiness.
You don't need to wait for someone to tell you that you are beautiful to feel it, This is all to do with your confidence, I know, and you will be able to deal with these issues soon enough, but if there was something I wished i'd learned sooner is to love myself and to see myself as so much more than I felt I was...
Present Me...
Can I just say, I am proud of where you are now, You have come so far and learnt so much, especially in the last year. You've come to realise that you don't have to settle, you don't have to take all the punches and kicks lying down, You've learnt to fight back and go after what you really want. Its been an emotional journey this year, and by the looks of things its still a bit rocky, but I am confident you're equipped to deal with it all - and when in doubt, Vodka. You can you can drink without passing out after 2 sips. Thanks Rach for that!
You have learnt to love yourself, like you never have before. I know there are times when you look in the mirror and that love is often hard to find, but once you've found it it will always be there. Just look a little harder.
You have an amazing circle of friends and family who have proved time and time again they are there for you and support you no matter what. Remember to show your appreciation to them more often, make them more brownies...
Future Me...
I hope by now you've managed to figure out who you are.
I hope you realise that you shouldn't let other peoples opinions affect your confidence in yourself or your self-esteem. Easier said than done, present me is still trying to get a hand on that. I just hope you're able to deal with it a bit better, with or without the vodka obviously.
One thing I hope that has not changed about you is how emotional you are. I know when things get hard it seems like the worst thing in the world, and at times its enough to make you cry out the bloody Niagara Falls or really get you down, but its this sensitivity that makes you who you are.
People tell me im kindhearted and "so nice"... maybe too nice sometimes... buts its your capability to really feel and empathise that allow those in your life to see this kindness. I hope you never lose that.
Above all I hope you are happy. Whatever you end up doing, or who you are with, or where you live... I hope its what you want and that you havn't succumb to your old ways of compromise and settling. Or if you have, I hope you find the courage to go after what you really want.
Which FYI is a castle in the country with a dozen pink unicorns running around outside and a butler to feed you tea and chocolate... oh and a puppy. No pressure!
Gem
Song of the day:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXhMqDotfLk
Little Mix - Little Me
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